Staying in Bed Day

My emotions are completely overflowing. My sadness is deep and my anger is fierce right now. My love of her is fierce too. Which meant my day was mostly spent in bed as I just can’t get the emotions under control. I hate that she is gone and I can’t do anything about it.

Right now I try to allow myself to be okay with having days in bed. Even having multiple days in bed. I know when it can be a bad thing, but this is grief and at times this is what it looks like. Being in bed in my pajamas all day. Crying off and on all day. Eating chips out of the bag. Hair sticking up and brushing teeth, if done, is done late at night.

It is feeling like October is going to be wave after wave of emotions. It is 5 days in and I am full of tears and tears.