Pierced My Ears

Yesterday I had my ears pierced. I had my ears pierced when I was in my early teens, but the piercings always had issues due to my sensitive skin. About 20 years ago, I just stopped trying to wear earrings. It wasn’t worth the burning, bloody, itching skin left behind from the earring. My piercings healed over leaving a faint mark where they once were.

Once titanium started being a popular jewelry material, I wondered if I could tolerate it. In successful first step, I wore necklaces and bracelets with titanium.

In June 2019, Michaela decided she wanted her ears pierced. It was an empowering moment for her as a transgender woman. We discussed that maybe it was something we could do together. In the end we felt it was an important moment for Michaela feeling good about herself to do this without it being an us thing and just being a her thing. I knew it would help her feel good about herself. She understood and agreed. She told me she would be there when I did mine at a later date.

In September 2019, Michaela started feeling sick before we knew the cancer was back. On my birthday in October 2019, she told me she wanted us to go have my ears pierced. I told her that I would prefer to wait until she felt better. She was disappointed. I wish I could go back and tell her “let’s go.”

There were lots of reasons I didn’t want to do that then, but now there is only one reason I wish I would have said yes to it. It outweighs all the reasons I put it off.

Now that I have short hair, I thought I should get my ears pierced. As soon as I thought that I had a meltdown because of the memories. I thought about what piercing them now would do to me and our memories.

Yesterday I decided to get them done. I hope she is glad I got them pierced.

(The photos are from the day Michaela McGruder had her ears pierced June 18, 2019.)