Caring Bridge - December 2019

Caring Bridge Journal Entry by Michael — December 10, 2019

Back in early September I got a flu like bug. I treated it as best I could but I wasn’t getting better. In fact in October I started going downhill. I went to a clinic doc who got me on some potent antibiotics. That helped for a while but more was going on. Again I slipped and went downhill. November I managed to find another clinic and that’s the start of the testing.

I learned I have an enlarged heart with fluid around it. Fluid was also present around my lungs. Then a CT scan revealed the bad news. An enlarged spleen. An enlarged liver. A significant mass on my spleen and a weird diffused deformity on my liver.

Yesterday I went in for another CT scan and got an ultrasound guided biopsy of the liver. Results won’t be known until next week.

Today I have little/no energy. My body hates me. I’ve been coughing since early September almost nonstop. I tire easily. Can’t sit for any real period of time. Can’t drive. Work has been diverted or extensions have been made. There’s the mental fog which makes it harder to play games or focus on reading or watching movies.

We hope today begins the next round of answers to our baffling questions. We’re hanging in there but being sick for this long has proven stressful. We’re exhausted mentally, emotionally and physically... and we realize we are barely at the onset of this thing.

I had hoped that my Voldemort kidney cancer was the last I would see, but alas - it is not. Whatever comes our way, we’re adopting the same phrase we did for my mom: one step at a time, one day at a time.

We don’t always get to write the future we want, but we can control how we feel today. There’s some calm in there.

I am surrounded by so much love and care. Dear heart friends lending their love and support - others giving help and assistance for Darby and in immeasurable ways. I couldn’t be where I am without her and we’re determined to face this head on. We are truly blessed and grateful as we continue a step at a time, a moment at a time, a day at a time.

Breathing as best I can, one breath at a time.