I just bought Megan Devine’s book and journal as every post she does I find myself saying yes exactly.

In June 2019, Michaela decided she wanted her ears pierced. It was an empowering moment for her as a transgender woman. We discussed that maybe it was something we could do together.

Art journaling my grief

Art journaling my grief 

This photo on the left is me a couple days after my birthday in 2017. M and I saw that cup and she said I needed it.

Art journaling my grief

When M and I were first together, one of our favorite dates was doing Tuesday night at the Avalon Theater. They do a “dinner and movie” special.

It is 3 o’clock in the afternoon. I sit in the middle of the bed not on my side, not on her side

Art journaling my grief 

My migraines have increased since M died which isn’t too surprising. I have had week long migraines many times over.

Michaela enjoyed having a corned beef sandwich on St. Patrick’s day.

Art journaling my grief

It was such a fun night when we went to see North by Northwest. It was snowing like crazy. We had to clomp through the snow to the theater after dinner. We laughed as we walked in the snow.

Art journaling my grief 

In therapy yesterday, I was talking about how most days since my love died, I walk around in a fog. I have brain fog where I will be in the middle of something and zone out and come back washing dishes or sitting on the edge of the bed,

I don’t know what other people do when they can’t sleep, but I rotate the mattress (pillow top so rotate instead of flip and rotate).

Art journaling my grief

Art journaling my grief 

Art journaling my grief

When Michaela was first diagnosed, right away she expressed we should get married. I replied, “we have time.” Our focus became cancer. It became our work and life mission. Everyday and every moment was working to fight the cancer. The thought of marriage was buried under it.